Heathenry in the Workplace

In a comment on my last post, I snarkily made mention that I don't use my real name in bloglife because I don't want it to negatively impact my yob. This is true. I don't own a hammer, but if I did I would have to either leave it at home or keep it inside my shirt where nobody can see it.

Why?

Because my place of work is owned by people who are pretty strongly Christian, and though they don't seem to have a problem with Hindus, Muslims, Jews, and Buddhists working for them (to name some of the religions that have been represented at the company), it's been made clear to me by others in the company that it's not wise at all to advertise that I'm a heathen--especially since several of our customers are pretty stolidly funformentalist Christian and have been known to try tracting employees who they know aren't Christian.

I've been able to hide behind company policy ("Thanks, but company policy doesn't allow the distribution of literature on the property. I appreciate the thought, but I'll have to decline"), but that only takes one so far, really. The closest I've ever come to putting up the big flashing neon hammer over my head was when I smilingly told one chap "And may Odin bless you, too" after he replied with "Well, may Jesus bless you then" after I politely told him that I couldn't allow him to leave tracts in our place of business and that "I have my own beliefs, thanks."

I find myself forced to ask how long I can go on perpetrating what I feel is a charade. I mean, it's not like I'll get strung on a rack and have a bowl of burning coals placed on my gut until they burn right through or anything, if I advertise that I'm heathen. But at the same time, I don't want to borrow trouble.

Knowhutimean?

He's getting better....

Those who know me know that my husband is not heathen (and that he's a little clueless, to boot). We've gone around and around about my being heathen, and he's driven me up the wall at times with his cluelessness.

But he's getting better.

...not by much, but he's getting better.

I'm sitting in the computer room, listening to "Odin Lives", and Mike walks into the room.

"What are you listening to?"

"Odin Lives" -- it's a weekly radiocast that gets posted up on the web. Since I have to work when it's on live, I listen to the archived broadcasts.

"You're still doing that Norse thing?"

Michael, I said as I turned to face him, I started on this journey when I was 11--after twenty-plus years of spiritual wandering, I finally came back to where I started; with the gods of our* Germanic ancestors. It's more than a "thing" with me. I'm cool with you not sharing it, but please don't belittle it.

Brief pause.

"Well, you belittle the Church."

In the past I have, yes. But I have long since gotten off that bus--when was the last time I said anything snarktastic towards the LDS Church?

He says nothing.

Exactly.

"Is this (he waves in the general direction of the latest two copies of Idunna) why you want to start homebrewing?"

I'd like to be able to be able to offer something that's not store-bought to the Aesir and Vanir, yes. Well that and I'd like to give some mead or beer to friends as gifts.

"Oh." His tone was one that indicated that the penny's finally beginning its long, slow drop.

Exactly.

Ah, bigotry. Gotta love it.

Convicted murder suddenly decides he's Tru, files suit asking for Llewellynized "ritual implements".

I personally don't know what's more sad: the lawsuit, the bulk of the items being asked for in the lawsuit, Asatru "prison outreach" to begin with, or the steady stream of effluvium issuing forth from the keyboards of the Christianists and other assorted ignorami in their haste to bash us.

It's hard to refrain from giving in to my baser instincts and leaping headlong into the fray, but really what is there to say? Nothing. I even agree with those comments that point out that the guy is a murderer who really doesn't deserve the time of day, much less "dragon's blood incense", "abalone shells", and "a wooden wand". I mean, did we read "Rites of Odin" a few too many times? Seriously, I'd like to know.

In any event: the sad hilarity of the article and its complete and total ignorance of what Asatru even is gets totally overshadowed by the complete and total idiocy of the commenters who do their level best to show off their gross ignorance by spraying such wonderful things as this:

"What color do you have to be to be included in this "religion?" I have been "inside" and have seen these Asatru followers, and they were all white. But then again, so were the Klu Klux Klan. Go figure?"

Because of course, Nidhoggr-fodder like Michael Lenz and various members of white supremacist organizations is such a representative sample right?

I don't see the point of "prison outreach", in any event. Very few and very far between are those inmates who aren't violent offenders, murderers, wife-beaters, robbers and all-round thugs. Why are we tru folks "reaching out" to them? Why are we going against everything that the ancestors believed in by "ministering" to those who would have been bog-fertilizer a few centuries ago?

Why? Why can't we just let the Christianists have them?

Somebody explain this to me, please.

Dipping a toe into the Well (cross-post)

I originally posted this to my hockey blog a couple days ago--since not many people here read there and vice versa, I'm crossposting it here (with some additional thoughts afterward):

A couple friends of mine asked why I went up on the mountaintop a while back, why I left when all kinds of juicy stuff started coming down the pike and people were surely hanging on my every word about such things as Vote For Rory and Sid Crosby getting chucked from a Dallas nightclub after the ASG cos he’s underage.

I didn’t care much about any of that. I was more concerned with my complete and total inability to get upset over the Hurricanes’ performance so far this season–performance that is decidedly less than stellar.

Had the Cup win somehow made me less of a fan? Had I lost my desire to see my team win? Was I still in shock?

And then it hit me: What had happened wasn’t the win itself. It was the Cup. Specifically, it was my finally getting to lay hands on the Cup.

As I said on HLOG:

You cannot touch that thing after your team has won it, can’t dip your hand in the pool of history and emotion that the thing is bathed in, and come away unaffected by it in some way. Anyone who says otherwise is either lying or dead inside.

There’s a a word for that pool in Old English: mægen. Main. It’s a spiritual energy that every living thing has. To relate it to hockey: it’s what makes a playoff game so electric. It’s what spurs a team on to great deeds. Objects absorb mægen from people that use them, that touch them–ask any craftsman who uses the tools that his (or her) parents and grandparents used if they feel like their ancestor who used those tools are watching over them and guiding their hands, and I guarantee you that the answer will be “yes”.

I keep coming back to the image of Mike Keenan sitting in his living room with the Cup, staring silently at it all night and letting its spirits quietly tell their stories to him until the sun rose and he was finally moved to tears. It’s such a powerful image, seeing somebody so moved like he had looked upon the face of God and touched the stars.

When I silently ran my fingers over the upper rings and bowl of the Cup back in September of ‘06, I plunged my hands into that deep pool of mægen like so many others have done before. In those few moments, I reached back through the years and shook hands with Howie Morenz and Bill Barilko and Maurice Richard and Georges Vezina and Sid Abel and all the other einherjar that have won the Cup and since moved on to play in the Eternal Game, and I came away forever changed by it.

The moment was epiphanic, an amazing moment of revelation where I finally felt like everything really was going to be OK–like an explorer cresting a rise and seeing the Seven Cities of Cibola laid out in front of him with the Fountain of Youth in the middle. I can honestly say that I wish every fan could experience it.

I still feel like I’m not properly articulating how it felt to be quite honest, but hopefully all of you will one day get to experience the wonder for yourselves.

Mahalo.

I toned down a lot of the talk, because I know that not everyone who visits the Virtual 'Cue Shack cares for meta-religious discussion. But I think I got the point across pretty well. ;)

Problem Children

(This post was originally made to my personal livejournal back in November 2006)

I just....I am so irritated right now.

Actually, that's not the right word. Discomfited would probably be better.

There's a mailing list thread going on right now about Loki--the conversation turned, briefly, to whether or not he should actually be worshipped....and it made me wicked uncomfortable.

In a nutshell (for those not up on the Eddas): Loki is a Jotun. He's also Odin's blood-brother and he hangs with the Aesir. He's commonly referred to as a "trickster", he's very chaotic, and not only was he directly responsible for the death of Baldr but he's also going to turn on the Gods come Ragnarok. Basically he's an outlaw at worst and a celestial con-artist at best. I mean, he walked into Aegir's mead-hall, killed one of his servants, and then proceeded to insult everyone in the place and fucking BRAG about his part in Baldr's death.

"Oh, but what about all the gifts he gave to the gods? What about Sif's golden hair and Frey's ship and Thor's hammer and Sleipnir and blahblahblahblah..."

What about them? They're schilder--they were given to keep the other gods from kicking the crap out of him. This isn't a Hermes we're dealing with here. This is a liar and a cheat and a general no-goodnik....and people worship the guy?

I'm with the Theodsmen on this one. Loki doesn't deserve worship. I acknowledge his place in the Lore, I acknowledge his power, but no way will I make a faining to him--especially because every time I even so much as talk about him at length, bad shit happens to me.

If I wind up in the hospital tonight, you know why.

I just don't get why there are people that insist on worshipping Loki. I just can't wrap my brain around it, unless I come to the conclusion that it's just some sort of knee-jerk reaction to perceived "Christianization" of Loki as the Devil. Then I can understand why people do it--but that doesn't make it any less uncomfortable for me. I just...yarrgh. Why would you want to embrace something that's brought more pain and sadness than anything else?

At the same time, I can see how he would be seductive, how one would be tempted to hail him as a balancing force--order balanced with chaos and keeping the wheel turning.

But he's not for me. I seek my balance in other more constructive ways, thanks.

Hockey and Heathenry

Forgive the rambly nature of this post, friends--it's 4:30 AM and I had to get this off my chest.

I'm sure some of you have found your way here from one of the hockey blogs I post/comment to: HLOG and Sweet Tea, Barbecue, and Bodychecks. Welcome to those folks.

For those who have found their way here from other locales (and who haven't noticed yet), I am indeed a hockey fan. For some reason, I always find it hard to articulate in print how my faith and my hockey-fandom are intertwined--which is very odd, because I'm usually much better at expressing myself in print than I am at expressing myself verbally. Don't ask me why, I just am.

For me, hockey is a strong expression of my faith. I've touched on it very briefly in my hockey blog, and I've never been shy about my being a heathen, but I've always been a little reticent about discussing it anywhere other than here and in my personal LJ for reasons that I can't fully articulate. I'm not afraid of getting deluged in flames--there was really only one toolbox that got upset about me not being Christian, and he's the one who has to deal with his own insecurity in his faith. The rest of the fandom really doesn't give a shit, from what I've seen (and the three or four Caniacs that would get bent outta shape about my religious beliefs know better than to tangle with me over it).

It's an amazing feeling, being at a hockey game and feeling the presence of the Gods. I wish I could better articulate what it's like when the building is full and the energy is intense and the boundary between the ice surface and plain of Ida is at its thinnest. It's almost epiphanic, when I can see the Gods watching on the sidelines and, occasionally, Thor taking a turn on the ice while cleverly disguised as one of the defensemen (I'm totally convinced that he likes to cleverly impersonate Mike Commodore from time to time).

There are sticks, there are pucks, there is ice....and there are the Gods.

Game on.

Harrowing

I decided to take the plunge and set up a harrow--I got the idea when I was at Sur La Table with my sister the day before I came back from my vacation trip to see her and her family out in Denver. I saw this red bowl (the small one, not the great big one in the picture--and they were being sold individually) and thought "This would make a good blessing-bowl". A personal-sized one, but a blessing-bowl nonetheless.

So a couple Saturdays ago after I got off work, I went to Crate and Barrel (because we don't have an SLT here in Raleigh...yet) and got this bowl and a "Tux" glass (the picture is no longer up on C&B's website). Total cost: $10. Nice and cheap and they get the job done.

Now I need to decide what I want to do for it next. I have an endtable that my friend Hayley gave me for Yule '05, and that will work fine for the "base". Would it be appropriate to put hockey-related stuff on it? Mebbe a picture of playoff-mode Mike Commodore, as a proxy for an idol of Thor? Suggestions from the audience are welcome.

I don't really give a damn what the hubby thinks of me doing this either--I'm doing this for me and my personal spiritual growth. And if it wigs the Elders when they come over to visit with him, that's a bonus. ;)

Au weia!

As a Forsetian, I try to be even-handed when looking at things--WWFD, and all that.

But sometimes, it's really hard to do that when I get confronted with the...er....we'll call them intemperate (not that I'm blameless on this matter, as those who read my hockey blog well know).

I refer the reader to this post on another blog (and not a bad blog, either). The second-to-last comment made me beat my head on the table in mental agony, because--though well-intentioned--it was pretty poorly-phrased and didn't come across very well (to me anyway).

I do know who Al Billings is, and I know of his issue with Steve McNallen and the AFA. I am also aware that McNallen was in the past intemperate with his folkishness--and that what I have seen from him lately is a great deal more moderate. But honestly, trying to make Billings out to be a non-entity who isn't worthy of being listened to isn't exactly going to make friends or influence people if you know what I mean.

Know what I mean?

As for Folkishness, I've made my thoughts on the matter known in this space before--the Gods call whom they call, regardless of that person's outward appearance or parentage. In that same vein, I offer a quote from a mailing-list post about the subject of the Billings/McNallen fight:

Frankly, if a[n] Ethiopian baby is adopted by a Swedish couple and grows up to run a restaurant promoting modern Swedish cuisine, he probably has a stronger claim on having a nip off the old folksoul than *I* do (and, besides, I hear the food is quite good). There is often an unwillingness among US heathens to factor the value of a land, and its spirits, in one's spiritual makeup, which I argue is a significant oversight on our part.

And that's about how I feel, too.

Know what I mean?

A Complete And Tru History.....

A goodly chunk of this was posted in my personal livejournal. I am reposting it (along with some of my other heathen-related posts) here.

My mother never raised me or my sister to follow any particular religion. She always told missionaries or other evangelistic types that "we have our own beliefs"--sometimes rudely, sometimes politely. I was never told what church to go to, and my own family background is rather religiously muddled; My mother was baptized Presbyterian. My father was RLDS. My maternal grandparents were Catholic and Baptist, respectively--and my Baptist grandfather's family was Catholic up until the parish priest told my great-great-grandfather Cardinal that he was living in sin and all his family was doomed to Hell because he wasn't married in an RC ceremony (they were kinda in the back woods of Quebec, so there was no local priest there for many years--just a travelling parson).

I grew up in a small town in North Dakota that was heavily Lutheran and Catholic, with smatterings of Pentecostal and Church of God. It was through the Pentecostals that I wound up finding my way to Christianity when I was 19--and I spent several years being completely and totally insufferable about it. To this day, my sister--who is very aggressively atheist--loves to give me grief about it even though it's a part of my past that I want to leave where it belongs...in the past.

I identified as Jewish for many years, for reasons that I couldn't even articulate--I think, in looking back, that I saw it more as a cause to fight for than as something I really actually believed. I sense that all the rabbis I spoke to about converting figured it too--because they kept telling me "If you don't know the reason why you want to convert, then perhaps this is not the faith for you."

The Aesir and the Vanir, however, I had kept drifting back to ever since I was first introduced to them as a child (when I discovered "D'aulaire's Illustrated Norse Myths" in our elementary school's library). Why? I don't know--or I didn't know at the time, anyway. In about 92ish, I started delving into learning about them and I discovered that there was an actual religion around them called "Asatru", but at the time the WWW was still in its infancy and there was precious little information about heathenry out there. So after a little while I moved on to other things. I eventually rekindled my love of hockey, and through it I found my way to a heavily UPG-ized personal belief system that was largely shamanic and had liberal dashes of various pagan faiths cobbled together with nails of Buddhism and a thin veneer of Wicca.

All the while, though, I kept identifying myself as being of a faith that I didn't really follow much. Judaism became a label for me, a blue blankie that was my armor from the wierdly curious, rather than something I really believed in. Why stick with a faith that you yourself don't believe? So I gave up calling myself that.

*sigh*

Soanyway. About midway through 2005, I felt the pull of the Aesir and Vanir again. This time, I listened. It was like...well, it just felt right. I had looked into my Italian heritage, but the Religio Romana didn't really appeal to me. Iuppiter et al. kept telling me "We understand why you're coming to see us, my dear, but your destiny lies elsewhere." I turned to my paternal ancestors, and that's where I found a home (spiritually speaking). The Shining Ones welcomed me with open arms and said "We've been waiting for you--welcome home!"

SO.

My husband (who is LDS), clueless and inattentive as he is, apparently didn't get the memo when I told him on the third Saturday of every month "I'm going down to the UU Fellowship for the monthly blot." He still says "You told me you were Jewish!" whenever I bring up anything even remotely related to Asatru...and this is the guy who told the Elders and damn near everyone else that I'm Wiccan. I can't eat anything pork without hearing "I thought you can't eat that!" and "treyf!" and whatever else. The other night when I asked him a direct question about the LDS Church and he couldn't answer me, I said "I don't want to hear you saying another word about my gods and goddesses, since you can't be bothered to learn anything about your own damn religion." His response? "When did you go Norse?! You always tell me that you're Jewish!"

*headdesk*

I give up.

Hockeyish rambling

So I decided to take a break from the hockey blog, and focus more on this spot.

I had left this blog lie fallow during the playoffs, because I'd been getting spammed with garbage comments from a Buffalo fan that apparently felt that his Desert God was calling him to be as assy as possible toward the dirty heathen Caniac.

*sigh* Shame on me for running and hiding rather than standing up to that shitbag like I should have.

Anyway. Ever since 19 June I've been...I don't want to say "uncaring" about hockey--but I've been a lot more contemplative about it. Everything I see is taken in a far more spiritual context now. I just don't have the anger that I used to have, I don't have the combative streak that I once did. I've tasted the miraculous wonderment that is winning a championship, and now I just wonder what there is to do now that it's done.

In a way, it's like I'm in shock. My wyrd, everything that I've seen and known was coming, has led me to 19 June 2006--and now I'm trying to decide if I'm free of that orlog cycle, or if I'm just not being allowed to see what's coming down the pike like I used to be. It's like something died in me that night, and I can't figure out if it was something bad or something good.

We'll see, I guess.

The Humble Heathen

There are times when I feel greatly humbled by the positive change that's occurred in my life since I finally answered the call that the Gods have been making to me since my childhood. This is one of those times.

I attend monthly blots here in Raleigh--mostly because they're the only things I can really get to because of my work schedule--and I've gotten to know quite a few of the local heathens. I've been asked to lead next month's blot (which is in honor of Forseti, my patron), and to lead the blots next summer during the months when the person who usually leads them is gone on business during blot weekends. I'm humbled by the esteem that she's given to me, even though I wonder what I've done to merit it.

I'm getting a promotion at work, over people that have been there longer than I have, and I'm being taught how to do the daily paperwork and prepare the daily deposits so that I can help the assistant manager run the store while our manager's on holiday for two weeks. Here also, I wonder why I merit it when surely there are others more worthy than I.

Does this mean that I've turned them down? Not at all--but it's very humbling to be held in such esteem. Perhaps it hearkens to my old life as a follower of the desert god, when I was taught to eschew worldly glory and esteem so that I might have some sort of nebulous "reward" in the afterlife. Who knows?

But at the same time, I do know better than to continually blow my own horn about them--accept the esteem, do the best I can, and let others speak of my deeds.

Happy is he who wins for himself
fair fame and kindly words

What I Am.

I AM:

A worshipper of the gods of my paternal ancestors, the Aesir and the Vanir.

I AM NOT:

A racist.

I DO:

Make offerings to my deities, seek their aid and guidance, and do my best to honor my ancestors and my descendants by doing good things in this life.

I DO NOT:

Perform a "Black Mass", sacrifice animals, give a stiff-arm salute, or dress up like somebody out of Lord Of The Rings.

I AM:

Respectful of others' belief systems, even if I dislike what some of their adherents do to/say about folks like me.

I AM NOT:

A follower of a deluded, megalomaniacal, and honorless (not to mention dead) Austrian housepainter.

I LIVE:

With honor.
In frith.
Boldly.

I BELIEVE:

That the Aesir and Vanir dwell yet in the Nine Worlds.

That my faith is my faith, and I have no right to force it on anyone who doesn't share it.

In the virtues of Courage, Truth, Honor, Fidelity, Discipline, Hospitality, Industriousness, Self-reliance, and Perseverance.

In doing what is right, rather than what is "right now".

That what we do in this life affects those who come after us, and that I am charged with living a life that my descendants would be proud of talking about.

That all are worthy of respect, even when they refuse to give respect to me.

I WILL:

Defend my kin and others, just as Thor defends the whole of Midgard.
Live a life of honor and worth, so that those who come after me will not be ashamed.
Speak the truth, even though it may currently be out of fashion.

WHAT I AM:

Is Asatruar--and I'm damn proud of it.

Is it just me, or...?

So the following was posted on a list that I lurk on:



My name is [REDACTED] aka Corax Dreamwalker. I'm fairly familiar with runes and rune magick, always eager to learn more. Over the years I've come up with some interesting, useful rune scripts. Some of which maybe I can share here as I get better acquainted with the group. I'm sure there's much to learn here. Thanks for letting me join. One of the motivations in joining is I live in a rather isolated part of the country and don't really have anyone near me to share my interests and questions concerning runes with. Forgive me for being so bold on my initial introduction but I do have a pressing issue and possible solution I'd like to run by the group if you don't mind. I'm in a situation where a few individuals are constantly harassing, provoking and threatening me. If I take the bait and react there will be personal consequences. If I don't react I'm left to "stew in my own juices". I fear of it coming to a breaking point where I will react despite my best efforts not to. So I've thought of what I believe may be a workable solution using a rune script. I've not used this one before. There are some "tricky" runes in it by themselves and by association with surrounding runes. Dangerous....yes. Possibly unknown or uncontrollable interactions.....yes. Worth it to rid me of my nemesis?.......yes. (I hope) Well here is my script for the situation as described above. Please let me know what your think.

Isa/Hagalaz/Thurisaz/Eihwaz/Sowilo

Please let me know if you think based on your understanding and experience if this rune script will indeed be effective in eliminating my problem. I'd like to hear some feed back first before I use it. Thanks,

Another thought, Though I've studied Norse history, beliefs and practices I am a novice. As a child I was always drawn to things about the Vikings. I just always thought they were really cool. As an adult I was re-introduced to things Norse in a roundabout way. I took the Myers-Briggs temperament test and fell into the category of an ENTP. In his book "Portraits of temperament" Keirsey suggests that ENTP's totem deity was Hermes and the other "Trickster Gods" after whom they seem to fashion themselves. Interested to learn more I researched the Trickster Gods and found Loki. True enough my personal temperament and personality resembles Loki in many ways. I'm reluctant to state this because I found allot of negative attitudes towards Loki. For a while I've considered myself a Lokean of sorts. The Norse Gods I've found most interesting is Loki and Odin. My interest in Odin was sparked by different associations I've found in Mythology and Astrology that linked me to Him. A study of Norse deities also introduced me to Runes. I've been enchanted ever since. Three Runes that I've read that are associated with Loki are Thurisaz, Ansuz and Dagaz. Like I've said I'm pretty much a novice so I'm not sure.
Though extremely interested in Rune Magick I've been somewhat hesitant to use them much because I realize there are certain rituals connected to there proper use and Blots to be made to associated Deities when using them. Being unfamiliar with the proper techniques I've not wanted to use them lightly nor provoke any disfavor from the Gods for disrespect. I'd been espoused to Christianity early in life but became disenchanted with that and later mostly thought of myself as an agnostic. I feel like I'm standing at a turning point. I feel a void in my spiritual life and lack a foundation on which to live and base my life. From what I've read and learned so far the Norse beliefs have many positive qualities and I'm not opposed to pursuing it further. I hunger for Magick, that much I'm sure. Anything that would enhance and make more effective my practice of Magick I'm interested in. To the folks of this group I defer to you and stand willing and eager for what you may have to offer. I've read that there are four principle of the Magi, to Know, to Dare, to Will and to Keep Silent. I crave to Know, and being associated with Loki to Dare is not a problem, I hope I have the Will and wisdom to Keep Silent. Thanks again so much. Live well,

Corax



I can hear some of my friends facepalming as I write this.

Basically, the guy wants horrible nasty things to happen to these people that are pissing him off, and he thinks that invoking the power of the runes will help. I read that post and--once I got past the rather pretentious self-gloss, random capitalizations, and the overall "hey, I'm a dabbler! Please help me do something super cool!"ness of it--felt rather wigged out by it. And judging from some of the responses that it got, I wasn't the only one.

The runes are powerful. I also leave them strictly alone, because I know damn well that I don't know WTF I'm doing (and don't want to wind up causing something horrible to myself)--and I especially don't touch Hagalaz, because it signifies catastrophe and disaster just as much as it signifies change. There was one time I tried to create a protective bindrune using the runes Thurisaz, Uruz, and Raidho--and all kinds of bad things happened in a very short span of time--my car blew up, my husband damn near lost his job, a co-worker almost collapsed from exhaustion on the job, a dear friend's dad is now on his deathbed, and my favorite hockey team almost got swept out of the first round of the playoffs...and all because a big chunk of the rune wound up as Hagalaz.

(In the grand scheme of things, I know that the team isn't THAT important, but all those events involved people or things that are important to me. You get the picture.)

I do believe in magic--at the very least, there's something "out there" that touches the tangible world and that people are able to reach if they try (some more easily than others)--but I also know full well that dabbling in things that one doesn't understand (and doing so for the sole purpose of causing harm to others) is a REALLY. BAD. IDEA.

Eeegh.

Mediation

Forseti teaches us that there are times when we need to step back and look at both sides of a matter in order to arrive at the truth. I've spent much time in thought, prayer, and meditation since first feeling the gentle tug toward the path of a gythja.

I think I'm ready to answer that call.

Keeping the Faith

Coming from a missionary faith such as Christianity to Asatru is quite the switch, even though I passed through a strange shamanic/paganistic hodgepodge belief system of my own devising on the way--especially when a friend comes to you who is troubled, and you think "Man, this dude really needs Odin (or Thor, or Tyr, or some other god/goddess) working in his life."

It's very hard for me to have to bite my tongue and try to keep everything in a non-heathen context, because I just feel like I need to share how my life has changed since I've "come home" to the faith of my paternal ancestors. I think it's the fanatic in me, which might explain why I'm being so cautious in responding to what feels like a call to the clergy. I want to be sure--absolutely, positively certain beyond a shadow of a doubt--that it's a genuine call to become a gythja and not just a phase that I'll outgrow.

We shall see.

Folker than thou, v2.0

I've been giving more thought to "The Folkish Thing", especially after listening to a talk by Steve McNallen of the AFA on the "Odin Lives" radio show. A lot of what Steve said made my heart glad--his vision of reintroducing the Gods to the folk and making Asatru a stronger alternative to mainstream religion, the idea of reintroducing to humanity that which has been lost to the followers of the desert god, and providing a place for descendants of the original folk to come to know their ancestral faith.

HOWEVER:

I find the denigration of "universalism" to be a little irritating, especially because it implies that--despite statements about free will and freedom of choice--if you're "not folk enough", then you aren't allowed to come to know the Gods.

That right there just isn't reaching me. If somebody who is of Hispanic extraction comes to me and tells me that he's feeling drawn to the Gods and wishes to know of them, I'm to just turn them away withand tell them to go worship gods that may not be speaking to them? I don't get it.

I can see preaching diversity. I get that. I support that. I support respecting others' cultures and belief systems (which is why I don't do as some do and put down Christianity). But that shouldn't mean that I have to turn away out of hand somebody who has a genuine desire to know the Gods, just because that person may not have "enough" of the blood of the Northern Folk in him. I'd rather tell him of the Gods, introduce him to the Lore, and let him come to his own decision through prayer and meditation.

I mean, that's pretty much what happened to me.

Folker than thou

Earlier this week, I went to lunch with a fellow heathen. One of the things we discussed was the term "folkish". I told her about when I was denied membership on a "folkish" message board, because under "ethnicity" I had "French/Italian/American Indian" listed along with "Swedish"--and that when I asked (out of curiosity) why I wasn't allowed to join the board, I was pretty flatly told that Asatru was not the religion for me because of the non-Scandinavian part of my ancestry.

Umm....excuse me? Last I checked, the Folk were all those who were called to the Gods. Not only that, but the Gods don't seem to care--I mean, they adopted giants into their number, so what the hell problem would they have with worshippers who aren't 100% Scandinavian/Germanic in origin?

Somebody please explain this to me.

Well okay then.

You can always tell a "wiccatru" poster on an asatru mailing list or discussion group, because that person is always the one who just doesn't seem to totally grasp the concept.

You don't have to form a kindred in order to be Asatru. You don't even have to be in a kindred, if there isn't one near you. The Gods don't care if you're in a group or by yourself, they'll listen to you all the same. But bringing a wiccan god or goddess into what is supposed to be a heathen setting or trying to mix Paganism and Heathenism is a pretty good way to get a heathen to look at you and say "Uhhh...you don't quite understand this, do you?"

Pagans tend to get really upset when you comment on it, too. Why? Part of the search for truth in one's life includes a hard examination of things, doesn't it? At least, it should. That's how I wound up becoming heathen, after a long and twisting spiritual journey that included forays into two "mainstream" religions.

I just don't get it.

Well, here it is.

This blog is a place for me to record my thoughts about my faith and topics pertaining thereunto. All are welcome to comment and discuss, but racists will find themselves in a heap of trouble if they attempt to spray their venom here.

Hail the Gods!